Unless you've got mental retardations giving you a child's mind - wtf are you playing at?

Don't really care if you're some huge Radiohead fan who arrives at the Pyramid stage at 11am to get on the barrier etc.

But I was at a tiny gig watching Best Coast the other night and there wasn't even a barrier.

Just the stage, then a row of horrid 30s men with receeders and beer bellies all staring at her like weird paedophile scientists. So creepy. They actually push cool young people (like me) out the way on their weird dashes to get on the front. Then just stand still, watching at the singer.

When I was 15 I ran to the front of gigs to jump around and get close to cool people like Carlos D and The Lead Singer From The Others (not rlly). But I had an excuse cos I was a bratty kid.

If you were one of these men, check yourself. If you know one of these men, check em.