May I present this:

"Hiya,

What's good? I saw that you're into Sonic Youth and I just wanted to congratulate you on being awesome. I go to school at NYU and we invited Thurston Moore and the Magic Markers to play last year… I'd never seen him in person before, he's a tall drink of water that's for sure. Ever seen them live? I keep missing them, they just played Daydream Nation in its entirety a little while ago and I couldn't go because I didn't have the cash. Hopefully I'll get to see them before the end of the year… Wish I was cooler.

I uncovered you from the corners of the internet because I'm interning at a new custom radio social networking site. I'm trying to find cool kids worthy of our invite only phase... Being that we share similar music ideas, I have about 100 invitations to pass out and I'd like to extend one your way. I think you'd be a good fit for our private beta testing-- checking out the site before it goes public, building your own radio stations, and making friends if you want them…

If this sounds like something you could get into, I got your invite link right here… To get on the site, just copy and paste this link, it will only work 100 times, so first come first serve sucka:

http://www.jango.com/?r=48284055

And once you're there: type in an band, listen in, and create personal radio stations by adding more bands. Imagine your own musical empire of personal radios! It's a way cool idea, non? To get an idea of what I'm talking about, check out my station, "Thurston Moore is a Tall Drink of Water," if you're down for it.

Take it nice and easy now,

Brenda"

The amount of effort that went into that is quite disturbing. I feel violated.