Postman Pat
Postman Pat and his industrial dispute

Where are my gig tickets?
Where are my new headphones?
Pat you are going to get a dry slap.

Everybody knows
You are lazy
Thieving scum from Eastern Europe
And West Africa

Maaaybe
I will forgive you
If I get home tonight
And Private Eye is there...

(all together now!)
Postman Pat
Postman Pat
Postman Pat needs to get PAID

Deliver my iPod
And my fucking headphones
Get them here by Monday you ginger fuck.

[softly strums acoustic guitar]

The End.