sorry this is another dullthread but whatever, I don't have a band to promote (Not until roughly September 11 2008) so BLAHS ALL ROUND

I was in Homebase, the DIY equivalent of attending 8 funerals in a day, and was trying to buy some wood for something I'm working on as an artisan back at my artisan's flat (ok ok it was DIY) and the long thin piece of wood I wanted to purchase needed cutting so I went to see the cutting dept ('cutting crew' loool) who said 'no its too small to cut'. So I in my gentlemen's voice replied sweetly that perhaps they could saw it manually to which they replied, again in that chinless watery way people who've worked in windowless buildings do that “no one has had hand saw training and its health and safety”.

Of course I was someone piqued by this and commented in a sociological way that the only training you need for a handsaw is to just be alive and have at least one arm top which led to a disagreeable scenario wherein all he could say whilst walking quickly backwards was “Health and safety. Health and safety. Health and Safety” like some malfunctioning mantra-obsessed Dalek shop assistant being spun around in some cruel playground game.

In the end I had to lean it against a wall and break it with my foot. Oh dear

ENDS