So I was in Tesco doing my shopping last night, and I had to choose which checkout to queue for: they were no free cashiers, so it required some thought.

At this point it's important to look at three things:
- What kind of people are in the queue
- How much shopping they have
- Is the person working the till a complete cretin

I chose the queue with one person just about to be served. She was a fairly well-to-do middle-aged lady, so there weren't going to be any problems with payment, although she would probably ask for Crap 4 Schools vouchers, which can hold things up. She was buying a single packet of paper plates. THIS SHOULD HAVE BEEN A WARNING.

Oh fuck it, I can't be bothered with the rest of this story, I'm starting to get bored.

WHAT KIND OF SHOES ARE YOU WEARING RIGHT NOW?