You've been sent down. You're going to go grey in chokey, you're doing 5 to 10 in the Pen. They've got your number, bang to rights. You've been sentenced to some time in prison, is probably the main point that I am trying to make right now.

As well as whatever it is that you're allowed to take with you, you can also have anything that you can keep up your ass for 30 seconds without shitting it out when made to squat. What would you try and get in through the back door, so to speak?

I'll go first, it's only fair - my iPod and charger. And if there is any room left then Cluedo, obvs