I just tried to talk my dad through looking something up on google maps.

It was one of the bleakest telephone conversations of my life.

I'd sent him an email with a clickable link that he couldn't make work and thought it might be possible to get him to the page I'd intended manually.

Fuck me was I wrong.

He had no idea that google was anything more than the little box at the top of his tiscali home page. He didn't know what I meant by copy or paste and when by pure luck we got to google maps via various shopping pages he couldn't work the map.

He's had his laptop for over two years.

I often wish that I was adopted.