Because I don’t care for shopping baskets, I’m one of those men (always men) who shuffle round the supermarket piled high with stuff in each hand, under the arms, between the teeth, clenched between the buttocks etc.

I think because of this, when I got back home last night from Sainsbury’s I realised I’d somehow walked out of there holding a single red pepper that I hadn’t handed over to the checkout drone.

Anyway, on my way past this morning I returned it to the shop and was greeted by looks of total contempt by the manager who seemed to not quite believe what was happening

‘Do you want to....pay for it?’
‘No, I don’t really want it anymore’
‘...’

I basically rented a pepper. But my point is, is there a minimum amount where returning something you’ve stolen brings more disdain than being caught nicking it in the first place? Because if there is, I think I breached whatever the unspoken mark is yesterday.