hello.

i have £20 in the entire world. when this inevitably runs out, i could do with some more.

because i'm finishing my dissertation non-stop, i can't really get a job until october. i have some paid work writing reviews, but getting the money out of them is proving difficult, so this cannot be relied upon.

so i am reaching out to you, dear diser

lord knows there are billions of people more worthy of your charity than me, but i'm not asking for charity.

i'll do stuff for money, provide a service.

not in a jackass, 'hey, eat your willy and i'll give you 50p' type way.

more in a....i'll share my skills with you type way, for money.

'BUT MICHAEL_W...' i hear you cry,....'YOU DON'T REALLY HAVE ANY SKILLS DO YOU?'

to that i repond, no. no i do not.

BUT...this is what makes it so interesting. it's like a social experiment, yeah?...about the market value of skills in a post-industria...erm. ok. it isn't.

shit.

ok...what about.....for every bit of money i get (quid minimum), you'll get a postcard from me. of an unspecified town in britain. and on the back will be words of wisdom, a funny line, my top 5 sexual mishaps, a thought, a bit of poetry, a quote from a film, something funny i saw that day in the street, , musings on love etc etc etc....anything, the possibilities are endless...absolutely endless

whatever it will be, it will perk your day up. EVERYONE FUCKING LOVES POST WITH STUFF ON JUST FOR THEM. and it will be just for you.

AND....the main appeal is, my handwriting is beautiful. i mean, it's lovely. really elegant and nice. like a fancy doctor. a fancy writer doctor. like chekhov. i've got writing like chekhov.

you'd love that, eh?

come on...who's in?

(obligatory, i hate hearing from you on here, why would i pay to have your thoughts on card in my house, post. go on theo, do me proud..)