Sleep deprivation - I only missed an hours kip last night due to a randy fox outside the window, but it's severely fucked me up today. God knows how I'd cope with a teething child thing.

RSI / Tennis elbow - RSI in the left arm from keyboard use (and a bit of Wii), tennis elbow in the right from work and badminton. AND NOTHING ELSE.

Back pains - My girlfriend finally said enough is enough and I'm now into my 4th rather expensive session of physiotherapy. But in all fairness, since I've been swimming a bit and doing the 30 minutes of exercises (NO, NOT THOSE EXERCISES) first thing in the morning it's been getting a lot better. She says I have the worst posture and upper body strength of a man my age she's ever met. Skillz.

Vitiligo - This is a new one. Found I have some yesterday, so off to sort that out on Friday all being well. Or get depigmented like Jacko if there's no hope for me. So that's nice.

Jeez, I'm only 31....

What the fuck is wrong with you?