I dreamed about my housemate meeting Michael Caine a few nights ago. My housemate was well chuffed, in dream and out.

I've never knowingly been in the same location as Michael Caine but there's every chance he was in Central London at the same I was at home when I lived on the outskirts of London. So I'm going to kick this bastard into gear with the bold claim that (assuming he stayed in The Dorchester, which he probably has done)

I'VE STOOD WITHIN 12.5 MILES OF MICHAEL CAINE.