Euro newboys Man City down to the very bare bones away against multiple Champions League winning Juventus. Zabaleta, Kompany, Mangala, Silva, Nasri, Bony & Kelechi all definitely out, Toure and Aguero rated 50/50. Talk about #mountain2climb.

Three times winners Man United have a routine home game against PSV and should win with ease, with Thumb in a Suit having pretty much the entirity of the most expensively assembled squad in British footballing history to pick from.

£100 on the double returns £335 of ale tokens. Boom. Anyway, must dash, Jean's accidentally locked herself in the janitorial cupboard again!