Ooh! Watching the critics grow queasy
Copying Coldplay is easy
Add EDM, oh so cheesy
It’s not very dignified too (ooh!)
We derided the mob on an old tune
Then realised we still craved their testoons
Now we court their approval like U2
I wish our singles could chart like Muse

I predict you’ll buy it! I predict you’ll buy it!
I predict you’ll buy it! I predict you’ll buy it!

I took a lucrative gig on the TV
Judging poor strangers for money
Though I’m no Frankie Valli
When I press hard on that button to spin round
If they’re conventionally pretty I’m spellbound
On the toilet circuit, should I be found
But I’ve learned it’s avoidable

I predict you’ll buy it! I predict you’ll buy it!
I predict you’ll buy it! I predict you’ll buy it!

If there’s integrity left in here,
I’d trade it for a long career

Sofa! One Show sofa!
One Show sofa! Sofa!
Aaaargh!

Ooh! This Brian Higgins production’s so sheeny
It’s not very pretty I tell thee
We’re like Girls Aloud, but more measly
It’s no way respectable

I predict you’ll buy it! I predict you’ll buy it!
I predict you’ll buy it! I predict you’ll buy it...