Most people in their twenties have gone through a grunge phase at some stage of their career. Hence the dodgy passport photos ca. 1993 ('Haha, look t my stupid Kurt Cobain hair...') and the fact that 'Smells Like Teen Spirit' is still able to populate dancefloors with people on the wrong side of twenty. Naturally, the phase of teenage rebellion with the help of alternative music stretched a lot further than just Nirvana. We all had a copy of the first Green Day Album and most of us probably still remember the lyrics to Killing In The Name Of. But the thing is, most of us grew out of that kind of stuff by now. The lumberjack shirts and armyboots have landed in Oxfam's and the Soundgarden singles collections are safely stashed away in your mum's attic. Now you're past twenty and what you see in the streets makes you feel old. We're talking Nu Metal brats. They're on the right side of twenty and still have the optimistic outlook that they're fucking unstoppable and that the world is theirs. Nice attitude, boys. And girls. So, here you are with your spikey hair, your walletchains and your Blink 182 hoodies. And you're telling us that the only good moshpits are those that involve serious bodily harm, because that's how punk you are. You probably shout at your mother twice a week, too. Teenage angst and all that. Needless to say that the perfect soundtrack to your part-time punkrocker lives has to be the latest Kerrang compilation. And the fact you're sniggered at by people five years older than you doesn't bother you either. That's because YOU have the big pants and the monstrous rucksack, the last laugh is on you. Shame you're not eighteen yet and getting into gigs can be a bit of a pain some times.

From a twenty-somethings point of view, you're (no offence) completely ridiculous, because we know exactly what's going to happen to you in a few years time. To most of you, anyway. You'll finish school, maybe go to uni and then get a boring nine to five job. Your band will split up in about a year and in 2005 you'll be looking at your old passport picture going 'Jesus, look at my dodgy hair. What WAS I thinking'. Sad, isn't it.

In the meantime, however, I'm planning to open a Nu Metal nursery, so that you can all learn how to knit jumpers with skulls on them, how to tip-ex your bags in style and, most importantly, how to cram both a school uniform and a spare Blink 182 hoodie in your rucksacks.